Saturday, July 23, 2011

Murphy, The Vengeful God of Law

So... Uh... THIS is awkward... Remember yesterday when I said we were all set to shoot our Witch stuff on Saturday? And remember how today is like... Saturday and stuff? Well... We started our day off properly, rising early so as to arrive early. We packed up everything we hadn't brought over already, Witch costume articles, cameras, scripts, storyboards, a cooler full of bottled water. Everything a body needs.

Despite getting stuck behind a very slow truck and trailer that was crawling along despite... not hauling anything, we arrived more or less on time. Norm arrived shortly after us, and we started to get set-up. While Norm brought in the mask and his various boxes and bins, Sean and I spent considerable time sticking tape to his walls. Don't worry, it's painter's tape, and for delicate surfaces to boot. I could hear all the property owners gasping...

In short order we were all set to go. Air conditioner was pumpin' out the cool stuff.

Haier, air conditioner of choice for L. Frank Baum's The Wonderful Wiard of Oz. Now pay up, People's Republic of China.
 Screen and markers were good to go.

Penn... Tennis ball of choice for... Oh screw it.
 Walls were checkered.

Yeah, no idea what brand of tape we used. Enjoy your blurry photo.
 Costume was ready and willing.

Say, that's a lovely rack.
 Norm's hands were nimble and his materials were prepped.

ABC slashes the budget on Extreme Makeover.
 But something felt off. Something was missing... Something a bit crucial and stuff... Marie. Y'know... the actress who plays our Witch. The most important cog in our terror machine. It was nine-thirty, making her a half hour late. This was so ridiculously unlike her that we started to get a little worried. We decided to give her a call, which required stepping outside and slowly loping around the back lawn in order to find the one area that the cellphone signal could penetrate.

We didn't reach her, so Sean left a message. We all sat inside and waited around for Marie. A little while later, my cellphone notified me that I had a message, so I stepped outside to find the signal again. The message was from a super-apologetic Marie, explaining that her car had broken down. After a little bit of phone-tag, we finally got to speak to her, and she explained that a friend was headed our way shortly, and she'd be there as soon as she could.

Not wanting to write the day off as a total loss, Norm, Sean, and I sat around waiting for Marie to arrive. Had a good ol' chat. Guy talk. None of your damned business, nosy. Around eleven we got another call from Marie. Her friend was just now heading out, which meant she wouldn't arrive until two thirty or three o' clock. Since it would take another three or four hours on top of that to get her into a camera-ready state, we decided to write the day off as a total loss.

I think Marie might actually read these things, so I just want to make it very clear that we don't blame her at all. Cars can be assholes. Everybody knows this. We've rescheduled for next Sunday, bright and early, and fingers crossed everything will go well.

It's weird, back when we were shooting with Dorothy, things kept going wrong, because Sean and I sucked. Now we suck less, and things still go wrong. Monday we'll be shooting Glinda's Guards... with a camera... Not like... criminally. Hopefully that can go off without a hitch. Because SOMETHING has to... right?


  1. I think that things going wrong is a big part of independent filmmaking. Not that I know the first thing about that.

  2. If our experiences are anything to go by... You're not wrong.